My Bloody Utopia

Hello everyone! How was your Easter? For us Orthodoxs, it hasn't come yet. It's on Sunday. Anyway, today I thought of coming back with another writing of mine...Tell me what you think❣️ •••I would have chosen you•••🥀 A candle is melting right in front of me... How blind can this one be? The poet is rotting on his own... And his absence has me alone... The fear is conquering my cell and I'm trapped inside this Hell. Should I kill you and then leave? It's my fault that I believe. I've been praying, take a clue! I would have chosen you. Since the night betrayed me All my dreams have failed me. And the demons have escaped, from the cage that is heart-shaped. And the blood, it still runs cold for the soul that you have sold. Save myself or save you two? I would have chosen you. I am fine, I am lying, every night, I shall be crying. And the candle now is dead, just forget what I said. In fact, I know you will. It meant nothing but a thrill. If...

Hello guys and sorry for being off for so long. In fact, I went to a music school. (I will probably talk about it some other time) Moreover, my personal life was a mess. I decided to put my thoughts down about a topic that upsets me very much and that is ABORTION. I am a feminist. That means that I support that women and men are EQUAL. (Not that women are superior) Some of us, women, support "my body, my choice" but a BABY, because it is a baby, is not a part of a woman's body. It is another, seperated human being whose life should be respected and protected.  If you can't face the consiquences in case they come, do not drop your pants. Both girls and guys. MURDER does not set you free of parenthood. It makes you the parent of a dead child. The child YOU killed.  In abortion, the woman is not the only one to blame. It is also the father of the child and the worst: THE DOCTOR. You are all feminists when it comes to having sex-because that is all some people car...

Hello guys and sorry for not explaining, but this is only for one person to read. I don't have another way to reach out to him and I know he reads my blog, so please bare with me💜 I promise to sing this song publically sometime. You wanted poetry, I will show you poetry, two-faced wannabe. •••I don't like you••• My brain freaks you out, every time I spit it out, I guess you'll figure out, next time you will be alone, I'll be forever gone. Big works and promised book, you are nothing like you look. Now I know you are a fool. I've been for ever wrong, to honor you with my song but you were my best friend when you decided to end everything we never had and my voice made you laugh or at least so you said but I know what you meant. See, I know you can't accept I'm happier than you will ever be you're the only rude pig I see, you suggested I sweep floors 'cause you have to stay in doors, in an imaginary prison I know you b...

Hello guys! Last post with 20 facts about me is deleted because the most are not true anymore. So let's just get to the 10 brand new ones!💜⬇ 1. The name change. I've been named after a person I don't admire or want to be related to, so I unofficially changed my name to Alice/Alissa (Alissa is the Russian version), to set myself free from any relations with that person. 2. Skin writing. I have dermatographism, skin writing, which means I am allergic to pressure and whatever I touch turns me red. I like to describe myself as an alive canvas and a form of art. I don't think I am sick because of that. 3. I am afraid of height. Yes, I actually can't even walk downstairs without being afraid. So what? 4. Absence of middle name. Before and after the name change, I've never had a middle name. 5. Coffee. I am a coffee addict. Any type of coffee. I just love it. 6. Hugs. My longest hug has lasted 5 hours. 7.Favorite color. My favorite colors are...

Hello and happy weekend guys! Today, I will share with you, something very personal. I want to dedicate this thing I wrote, about a person I loved with my whole heart. Unfortunately, he wasn't "a big cat", like I thought. (you will understand what I mean.) I was inspired to write this by a song named "The Rains of Castamere" ( https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ECewrAld3zw ) it didn't just make me write it, after I heard it, it just reminded me of the person I thought he was. Then I decided to write this. Let's just jump to the main thing👇 If you ever read this, -you will know it's about you- this is for the person I believed you were. It's pretty plain and simple but I am no abuser of words, like you. This is for the person I loved, too bad, it wasn't a real person. •••A big cat, with a lot of fur••• Lost in the jungle, a small cat desperately cried: "I need some help, mind you please? My grandma has just died." A lion heard ...

Have you ever tried to make friends, without managing to fit anywhere? Things are even harder, when you are a Religious Goth, like me. Other people often mistake me for an aggressive person, only because of my style. It's very sad that looks play such an important role today's world. Unfortunately, very few people value feelings, which is what actually matters. On the other hand, the Goths sometimes reject me, due to the fact that I have combined my style and my views in a unique way. I firmly believe that the style and the views of every person, are a matter of personal experiences and choices they have been called to face in life. I understand not liking someone for their views, but rejecting someone for their style, is the stupidest thing someone can do for me. I am not going to "choose" like they ask me and whether be religious or Gothic. I'm a Religious Goth. That's what I am. As it was told by the ancient Greeks, "you should not hate someone for t...

Hi people! If you did not know, I am dealing with dermatographism. (I will write about this on another post) Hair dyes are not the best thing for people whose skin is sensitive like my own. If you have allergies, urticaria or anything similar, that post will help you! •••Homemade hair dye••• Things you need: 1. Craft paper. 2.Salt 3.Water 4.Iced water **Preperation** We boil some water, depends on how much hair dye we need. In a bowl in which we already have cut and put the craft paper, we pour the water we've boiled and we add a spoon of salt, we leave it for 10 minutes and then we add ice. When the ice melts, we throw away the paper, which has drained its color. Then we dye our hair. We leave the hair dye on our heads for 20 minutes and then we dry our hair. DO NOT WASH. Next day, you can wash your hair, it'll not fade. It lasts for 10-20 days, depends on the color. It doesn't need bleach. It will happen no matter what color your hair is. I hope I helped...

Hello everyone and happy new year! This is my first post of 2k18! I will share another thing I've written with y'all!❤ ••My immortal nights•• Another immortal night, creating memories I shall never, ever escape. it has covered the bites as I removed my coat. Long, black and heavy. It wasn't raining... I'd bet it was. My hands are red and sweaty. Bloodless vampire, Worthless Eve. Why? Why can't immortals die? Burning skin, cold heart. Piercing deep into your soul. Her blood, I can taste it. my tears, she can feel them. That's my immortal night. But red is not your color.

Hello everyone!Recently, I had the chance to attend Dani Divine's show and as many of you are her fans, I decided to write about my experience, as promised. (Before we jump to the point, I apologize for the plain writing of my recent posts, but my PC is temporarily unavailable, so I gotta make the best of what I got, aka my phone.) So, I arrived early at the place where the show was held, about 5 hours earlier, as I am an enthusiast and I wanted to anti-stress (is that an actual word?) myself. The club wasn't opened yet, so I just took silly pictures and I waited. About an hour before the show was starting, people started to arrive. The doors finally opened at 11.30 (whoever follows the club's page, knows that the club opens at 11 typically but practically at 11.30). Until Dani arrives, we were free to dance and conquer the stage, which was fun. Some minutes before she enters, we were told cheer and fan girl for her, which I was glad to do. When she finally came on stage, ...

make up & edit by me💜 Hi everyone! Do you often think of going out and you want to have a gothic look? In this post I will give you a way in 10 easy steps! Girls: 1. Find a dress of black, red or purple. 2. Bride your hair and then do it up. For shorter hair, do it up using gel. For medium length, straighten it. 3. Whiten your skin with white foundation and consiler. If your skin is darker, use foundation and consiler that matches your skin color. 4. Add black eyeliner. 5. Use black mascara to make your eyelashes look bigger. 6. Wear black, red or purple lipstick. 7. Dye your nails the same color as your dress. 8. Wear black shoes. 9. Add perfume 10. HAVE FUN!!! Guys: 1. Find black jeans. 2.Find a red, black, grey or purple shirt. 3. If you have long hair straighten it. For shorter hair, do it up using gel. 4. Wear cross earings! (if you don't have pierced ears you can find fake ones) 5. Wear black shoes. 6. You can dye yo...

Hello! I received a lot of messages, asking about my health, I'm healing. Thank you for caring♡ Today, I've decided to share something I've written with you! Before that, I would like to invite you discover my page "My bloody Utopia", as I am going to upload a lot of things there. Let's just jump to the point.👇 •••THE PALE SKY••• I am the darkness, my scars are the stars. Each one for the people I miss. Each one to remind me of those who laughed at my wish. I am an alive pale canvas, full of marks. Hatred draws on me, using my blood, creating a map that leads to the endless love of me. The smile I faked so perfectly, may never know the taste of freedom. If I could taste the dream, it would drive me insane, wouldn't it? The wind whips me, the night weeps for me. Your embrace, my prison forevermore. I shed a tear in the middle of the night. A moth touched it and it taught it how to fly. My skin, a pale sky. Clouds all over my he...

Hello everyone! Let's get straight to the topic. 10 myths about Goth!! 1. ALL Gothic people are Satan worshippers. That's a total lie. There are people who do worship Satan, not only in this community but everywhere. The majority are atheists. There are also religious people, like me. 2. ALL Goths think they are vampires. Actually, most of them want to be vampires but know they are human. They may believe in vampires without thinking they-themselves are. Some of them might believe they are vampires or might be vampires (meaning they drink blood) 3. Goths dress up in black. Ever heard about pastel Goth? Check my post "Trying out pastel Goth". Besides, red and purple are popular by Goths. 4. Goths are always sad. ARE YOU EVEN EXPECTING SOMEONE TO EXPLAIN WHY THAT IS STUPID?!?! 5. Asian Goths are just kinky people who have no idea about metal. How racist!In fact Asian people rock Gothic styles! Speaking about racism... 6. Black people can't be Gothic. Wh...

Hey guys, sorry I have been inactive for so long, I've been facing health issues. Don't worry, I'm going to be fine💜 So, today I decided to write about something that a lot of people consider to be a normal thing, even though it's not. When we are down and alone, we ask ourselves the following question: "Where is *x* in all this?" "All this"is your life. Unfortunately we can't expect anyone to stay with us and help us the way we want or need to be helped. That's because noone no matter how much they love or want you to be okay know how to act under every circumstance. People can be cruel, but that is not the only case they are unable to help...Sometimes they are as scared as you are, other times it may hurt them to accept you're hurting. So they act as if you're not. The ones who love you the most,may feel useless when you are in need and there is not much they can do...It is so hypocritical when someone says "I know how you fe...

Hey guys, I apologize in advance for the quality of my make up, but all of my lipsticks are dark and almost all of my make up products are dark.  So, in this post I decided to talk about my experience of trying out Pastel Goth,  because a lot of people are under the wrong impression that you have to dress up in black or generally dark colors in order to be a Goth.  In case you don¨t know what Pastel Goth  is, it is a style|a trend, in which people follow a nu-or grunge-gothic style, usually dying their hair in pastel colors and use pastel colors in their clothing or make up or maybe both. My own explanation would be making cute things looking Goth. I personally prefer the dark version of Goth, all black or dark purple. I still admire that kind of style and I love it but I just think it does not suit me as much as the one I keep. After trying it, I decided to use it from time to time, as the result looked interesting to me. So, I apologize again, but that¨s the b...

Hello! What happens when a Gothic girl decides to spend her holiday in a traditional village? It wasn't my favorite experience! IMAGINE: You are a Goth and it is Summer, like everyone else you decide to go on holiday and you choose to visit your family in their village. You dress up the way you always do, in black, you do your hair in a simple yet dark way and you add some black lipstick in order to complete your look, which comes from your ideology that has nothing to do with your religion, your sexual life and doesn't affect the way you treat others. You are excited to see them as it has been 4 years since you last did. When you knock on their door, your aunt runs and opens and gets very happy to see you, doesn't even notice how your style changed and focuses on asking how your life is and how you adapted in your new job. Everything is great until your cousin shows up. You are so glad to see her and you wanna do stuff together, as you have missed her tones. Unfortuna...

Happy Halloween Let's get a little more spooky today! I have planned a lot for you in this post, so let's not waste time! 5 facts about Halloween! LET'S GET STARTED! 1. It is   actually the Devil's birthday!  2.There are countries in which Halloween is not celebrated 3. Halloween is the second highest grossing commercial holiday after Christmas. 4.''Witch'' actually comes from ''wise woman'' in Old English.  5.The fear of Halloween is called ''Samhainophobia'' My theory about Vampires! As promised, here's my own theory about Vampires. I hope you enjoy!  Vampires are actually angels, which drink the blood of humans in order to save them and they live with the humans' pain and diseases. They never die because they feed themselves pain so human beings don't have to deal with it. They can disappear when you stab their heart because it is the only vivid organ they have, so that they can love....

Hello guys! Thank you SO much for the support you've been showing me! I really can't express my gratitude towards y'all.💜 so, today My development   I decided to open up in a personal level and tell you about how I decided to change my style into something dark & gothic. As a kid and teenager, I used to be a girly girl even though I didn't enjoy make up and doing my hair. I was fan of pink but at the same time, I have always been (always meaning ever since I remember myself) a fan of vampires. Vampires, for me, have a different meaning and I have developed my own theory about them, which I will talk about in another post. So, back in 2016 I had the honor to introduce myself to a great person, a person I admire and love my whole heart. (who it is doesn't matter) So that person, had a darker style, but was so warm and nice towards other people. By seeing that, I realized that I can be both. I can be a good person who is into gothic. I realized it doesn...

maybe a lot of people are vampires. But not the ones we love to read about. The ones we dress up as, the ones we make stories of. No, they are another kind. The bad kind. Those who suck your happiness and make your soul dry and cold. Those who see you cry and your tears feed their emptiness. Those that know you are dying and only care about themselves, so they don't come to your funeral, so that they won't be sad seeing you dead, even though when you were alive, they didn't show much happiness about it. These people raise their hands. They show me and they tell each other "that girl is a Devil worshiper,she calls herself a vampire and dresses up in black". The irony. Makes me anxious to think that there are only a few people out there who can read and understand and feel this. But it also makes me proud if I manage to get to them and have the honor to have opened up to them. On a brighter note, makes us even more special that we are rare!💙

hello, my name is Alice. I decided to make a blog, because I wanted to share my passions, hobbies and interests with other people. I love music, poetry and gothic stuff. Even though I do love gothic things and gothic literature, I believe in God. -Yes, I know many people do that but I just wanted to state it- I enjoy writing and singing, without considering myself to be a professional in any of these two. I hope you will like me! I will leave a photo of myself here because I imagine that a lot of people would like to know who is behind ''mybloodyutopia''... here's myself and my beloved teddy! hehe!<3